Introduction

In the depths of our hearts, we all carry stories—stories that shape our lives, both the triumphs and the tribulations. These stories, like threads woven into the fabric of our existence, often echo the experiences of generations before us. Yet, amid the shadows of our past, there is also a glimmer of hope, a ray of light that pierces through the darkness—a light that can illuminate the path to healing, resilience and transformation. "Letters to Monique: A Journey of Breaking Generational Trauma" is a testament to that light—a collection of letters, a journey of self-discovery and an offering of love.

The inspiration for this book began with a simple act of love and faith, a tradition I started when my daughter, Madison, turned ten years old. Each year, on her birthday, I would write her a heartfelt letter, a message of love, affirmation and encouragement. These letters were more than just words on paper; they were a reminder of the boundless love she received not only from me but also from her heavenly Father and those people around her. They were a testament to her worth, her strength and her capacity for greatness. Yet, as the years passed, I discovered something unexpected. In writing these letters to Madison, it was as though I was speaking to my own younger self. They were the words I wished someone had cared enough to tell me during my own journey through life's trials. 

As I penned these letters, I began to understand the profound impact of breaking the cycle of generational trauma. I realized that our stories, though shaped by the past, need not be confined by it. We have the power to change the narrative, to rewrite our destinies and to emerge from the shadows into the light of our true potential. These “Letters to Monique” are a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the transformative power of love, faith and self-discovery.

In the pages that follow, you will find not only my words to my beloved little girl inside but also a message to anyone who has ever felt weighed down by their past. You have within you amazing gifts from God to overcome any obstacle or trauma you may have faced or may currently be facing. It is my hope that by sharing my journey, you will discover your own path to healing and transformation.

In the book of Isaiah 43:1-2 from the New Living Translation (NLT) of the Bible, we find a verse that encapsulates the essence of this journey: "But now, O Jacob, listen to the Lord who created you. O Israel, the one who formed you says, 'Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name; you are mine. When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown. When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you.'"

This verse reminds us that we are not alone in our struggles. God knows us by name and promises to be with us, guiding us through the deepest waters and fiercest fires. It is my sincere hope that as you journey through the pages of "Letters to Monique," you will find the strength, courage and inspiration to break free from generational trauma and discover the amazing gifts that lie within you.

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Dedication

This book is dedicated to my beloved children, Madison, Andrew, Vincent and Koralynn. From the moment you came into my life, you became my greatest source of inspiration, love and hope. It is to you that I owe the courage to embark on the journey of breaking generational trauma, so that you would never have to endure the pain, heartache and suffering that I did. You will experience those things, but I always want you to know that it will never be as a result of my actions or choices. I want you to feel safe and know that I am always here for you, no matter what.

I dedicate this book not only to you but also to your children and grandchildren, with the fervent hope that one day, our family will be free of the heavy burdens that have bound us to generational trauma. May we forge a new legacy, one built on the foundation of unconditional love that knows no bounds, and one that does not waver in the face of the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual challenges that our ancestors grappled with.

As we journey together through these pages, may you carry with you the knowledge that the love that binds us transcends time and circumstance. It is a love that will guide you through life's trials and tribulations, just as you have guided me. With this book, I offer you not only my love but also the tools to uncover the strength, resilience and grace that reside within you, waiting to be unleashed.

With all my love and dedication,

Mom

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Message to the Reader

Dear Reader,

As I pen these words, my heart is filled with both trepidation and excitement. I stand before you not only as a Christian woman but also as someone who once carried the weight of a traumatic past, a scared and hurt little girl who felt lost in the shadows of her own pain. Today, I write this letter to the dear little girl within me—a testament of healing, redemption and the unyielding love of our Heavenly Father.

This letter is not just for me; it is for all those who have ever felt the grip of fear, experienced the wounds of a broken past and struggled to find their voice. It is for the ones who have hidden the scars of their trauma, fearing that their pain would define them forever. I share my journey, not for sympathy, but with the hope that my story will ignite a spark within you, to seek healing for the dear little girl inside of you.

In 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NLT), it is written, "This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!" This verse encapsulates the transformative power of God's love and grace. He took my brokenness and turned it into beauty. He breathed life into the shattered fragments of my heart, creating a new person—an overcomer, a survivor, a woman filled with His strength.

To you, my dear reader, I encourage you to find the courage to speak to the little girl inside of you—the one who bore the brunt of pain and sorrow. Acknowledge her fears and hurts, for in doing so, you will unlock the doors to healing. Embrace her with love and compassion, for she is a precious child of God, deserving of His unconditional love.

I hope this letter serves as a reminder that you are not alone in your struggles. Your pain does not define you; it is a part of your journey, but it is not your destination. God's love is greater than any trauma, and His healing touch can mend even the most shattered hearts.

May my story inspire you to share your own, to break free from the chains of silence and shame. By speaking to the little girl within, you will find the strength to heal where you were broken, and in turn, inspire others to embark on their journey of healing.

Let us join hands, dear reader, and walk this path of healing together.

Let us uncover the strength that lies within us and allow God's love to guide us toward wholeness and freedom.

I pray that this letter will be a beacon of hope, pointing you towards the love of our Heavenly Father—a love that knows no bounds and can mend the deepest wounds.

With love and anticipation for the healing that awaits you, your sister in Him,

Monique Myers

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The Letter

My Dearest Monique,

As I write these words, tears fill my almost 50 year old eyes, for I carry within me the weight of the pain you endured as a child. You may not recognize me now, for I have grown into a woman, but deep within my heart, I hold every memory of you—the little girl who endured so much, who lived in fear and who yearned for love and acceptance.

As you read these words, know that they are not just from me, but also from your loving Father in Heaven, who has been with you through every single moment of pain and struggle. His heart ached with yours, and He longed to take away your suffering. He sees you as His precious child, fearfully and wonderfully made, and His love for you knows no bounds.

In the book of Psalms, He tells you: "You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it." (Psalm 139:13-14, NLT). You are not worthless, for you are a masterpiece created by the hands of a loving Creator.

God granted you the Spiritual Gifts of Administration, Discernment, Hospitality, Knowledge, Leadership and Wisdom when you were born. He knew you would need these Gifts of the Spirit to navigate the childhood that was a result of generational trauma that you were sent to disrupt. Administration has been a source of stability and structure for you. Discernment is a gift that was instrumental in your journey to healing and self-discovery. The gift of Hospitality is a powerful tool to create a nurturing and loving atmosphere. You have used your gift of Knowledge to gain insights into the Word of God and how it applies to your life. The gift of Leadership has developed the ability to guide and influence others positively in you. The gift of Wisdom is the ability to apply the knowledge and experience to make sound decisions and provide godly counsel. God wove these gifts together, in you, to help you navigate the pain and work it for HIS good. As Paul wrote to the Romans, “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” (Romans 8:28, NLT).

I want you to know that I love you unconditionally. I see you for who you truly are—an innocent, brave and beautiful soul. Your worth extends far beyond any hurtful words or actions that were thrust upon you. You were never, and will never be any of those things. Those words and actions were lies borne out of the pain carried within the heart of the one speaking to you, and you did not deserve to be the target of their suffering.

I want you to understand that it was never your fault. You did nothing to provoke the cruelty you endured. You were a child, deserving of love, care and protection, and yet, life dealt you a painful hand that was beyond your control. I am sorry that I could not shield you from those things, but I promise you this: you are safe now, and I will protect you with all my strength moving forward.

Your Heavenly Father is the God of comfort, and He whispers to you, "I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So, don't be troubled or afraid." (John 14:27, NLT). He wants to heal the wounds that have haunted you and give you the peace that surpasses all understanding.

Your fear was a natural response to the traumatic experiences you faced. But I want you to know that you are stronger than you think. Your resilience through those dark days is a testament to your inner courage. I wish I could embrace you in a warm hug and whisper in your ear that everything will be alright. I want to wipe away your tears and replace them with the smiles of joy I proudly wear today.

Your Father in Heaven sees your pain and sorrows, and He invites you to cast all your cares upon Him, for He cares for you deeply. As it says in 1 Peter 5:7 (NLT), "Give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares about you." Let Him bear the burdens that were never meant for your small shoulders.

You deserved a childhood filled with love, laughter and support. You deserved people who cherished you and nurtured your dreams. I am so sorry that this was not always true, but I promise you that I will be there for you now, just as I wish someone had been there for you back then.

You are cherished, my dear little girl within, and you are never alone. God's presence is a constant in your life, and He will continue to carry you through every trial and every triumph. Hold on to His promises, and allow His love to fill the broken places in your heart. Isaiah 41:10 (NLT) "Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Don't be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand." This is a beautiful reminder that no matter how scared or hurt you felt, God was always by your side, offering His strength, support and love.

I encourage you to continue to share your story. You will keep discovering a sacred bond with those who have walked similar paths. This connection will foster an environment of understanding, empathy and support. You will become a safe place for others to open their hearts and share their pain, knowing that you will not judge them but will instead extend the same comfort and light that God has lavished upon you.

In Romans 12:15 (NLT), it says, "Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep." Through your shared experiences, you will be able to empathize with the joys and sorrows of others, offering them companionship in their journey. Your story will not only introduce you to people who can relate to your pain but also to those who can celebrate your victories alongside you.

As you continue to grow into the woman you are destined to become, I want you to know that you are enough. You always were, and you always will be. Embrace your uniqueness, your passions and your dreams. Find the strength within you to heal the wounds of the past and to discover your true potential. Know that without the pain and sorrow you experienced then, you would not have the wisdom for the journey you are on now. 

"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; He rescues those whose spirits are crushed." (Psalm 34:18, NLT). He sees the pain you endured, and He longs to heal your heart and restore your spirit.

Remember that you are not defined by the scars you bear but by the love and light that reside within you. You have a voice that deserves to be heard, and I am here to listen, to support, and to love you unconditionally.

I see your beauty, not just on the outside but within your heart and soul. You are worthy of love, care and understanding, and I promise to give you all the love and care you deserve. Together, we will navigate through the shadows of the past and bring healing and light into your life.

I am proud of the person you are becoming, and I am excited to witness your growth and blossoming into the wonderful woman you are meant to be. Trust that the scars of the past will not define your future. Love yourself as fiercely as I love you, and remember, you are not alone—I am here, and I will always be here for you.

You are His beloved daughter, and He rejoices in you with singing. Zephaniah 3:17 (NLT) says, "For the Lord your God is living among you. He is a mighty savior. He will take delight in you with gladness. With His love, He will calm all your fears. He will rejoice over you with joyful songs."

So, my precious one, know that you are deeply loved and cherished by your Heavenly Father. Let His love wash over you like a healing balm, filling every crack and crevice of your wounded heart. Embrace His love and find solace in the knowledge that you are not defined by your past, but by the grace and love of your Heavenly Father.

With all my love and understanding, and the love of your Heavenly Father,

Your Grown Up & Healed Self